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The movie THE SUBSTANCE

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Raquel
(@raqulo)
Student Member
Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 4
Topic starter  

Last week I went to the cinema with my husband to watch the new Demi Moore's movie THE SUBSTANCE.

I was very excited because I had heard so many things abut it. I was interested in it because the sinopsis said it was about the pressure women receive regarding their appearances: always looking good, always wearing make-up but subtle and not too noticeable, always fit but not too much so you don't look bulky, always young but not too much so you don't look operated, etc.

The movie is about a successful woman who stars a fitness program. When she turns 50 years old, her boss fires her and looks for a younger and more "fresh-looking" girl for the program. The woman starts feeling old and ugly, and finds this substance that lets her have her body one week, and the body of a younger "better-self" every other week. The only premise to this switch is that she needs to change bodies every week with no exceptions, or her 50-year-old body will deteriorate at very very high speed. As expected, she likes her life as her "better-self" far more interesting and kind, so she extends those weeks some days, and has to live with the horrible consequences that these extensions have on her 50-year-old body when she does in fact switch.

Although it sounded interesting, we both left the room a bit disappointed after the movie ended. We liked the beginning as the plot was building nicely and we were really invested in the story. But as the movie went on, it started becoming way too slow, and we felt like the message started fading into the gore aesthetics of the movie. It has a lot of references to other movies like the Shining or Pyscho which I am sure the fans will appreciate, but overall, we do not recommend this movie. Perhaps wait until it is out of the cinema screen and watch it for free at home! πŸ˜‰


   
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Luke
 Luke
(@llt)
Tutor Admin
Joined: 3 years ago
Posts: 21
 

@raquloΒ 

Hi Raquel,

Thanks for your film review.

Please find your reviewed writing attached as a .docx

and as a PDF link below.

Any questions or doubts, let me know.

Cheers!!

Luke

Review-PDF


   
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Raquel
(@raqulo)
Student Member
Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 4
Topic starter  

@llt Hi Luke, thanks for the review of the writing. Although I have reviewed the "Revision Key" ( https://lukelanguagetraining.com/community/revision-ins-key/review-key-please-read-this/) I am not quite sure I understand correctly. For example, in the first sentence "Last week I went to the cinema with my husband to watch the new Demi Moore's movie THE SUBSTANCE." I see there is an extra word (is itΒ the new movie?) and an issue with the word order, could you perhaps be more specific? It'd be helpful if you could perhaps send it revised in tracked changes in word, or with more detail in each revision.

Β 

Looking forward to hearing from you.

Β 

Thanks

Β 


   
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Luke
 Luke
(@llt)
Tutor Admin
Joined: 3 years ago
Posts: 21
 

@raquloΒ 

Hi Raquel,

The LLT review method is collaborative, so we start with guiding you to where there are issues with the writing.

Once you've had a look and thought about the identified issues, we encourage you to do a rewrite, and from that we can see what problems were perhaps small slips, and which ones need further guidance.

In the second review, we are more explicit in our suggestions, though still guiding you towards self-correction.

After reviewing the final (3rd) version, we give you a breakdown of areas that require further study, and any explanations of things you haven't managed to resolve independently.

I hope that makes things clearer, and you can see the benefit of this approach.

Please can you make the changes that you think might address the identified issues and re-submit your writing?

Thanks, and all the best,

Luke


   
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Luke
 Luke
(@llt)
Tutor Admin
Joined: 3 years ago
Posts: 21
 

By the way,Β 

the "I ask because:" in the comments, is an error.Β 

Sorry if that added to the confusion.

Thanks,

L


   
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